Unlike most of my other twenty year old friends who all got pregnant accidentally, I on the other hand, waited for that moment. The moment when I saw a positive sign on my pregnancy test. It's funny how you might think that I'm too young to have a baby, but I considered that moment miraculous since a few years back some doctors told me that I'd have problems conceiving due to endometriosis. In fact, because of that illness, I had to go through oophorectomy - surgery where my left ovary was removed. The doctors told me that there was a big chance that my right ovary would also have to be removed, so if I ever wanted to give birth, I would have to get pregnant ASAP.

I wanted to race against time, and I'm glad someone was there with me, my then boy-friend, now my husband. Trying to conceive was difficult, and months after my surgery, the doctors found out a new cyst near my right ovary. We were totally devastated, as it even reduced the already limited chance I had to conceive.

I guess the magical feeling I felt will always be true to mums.

But at last, in March 2007 I saw those two red lines. My husband was away at sea then due to work, so I wasn't able to share the news to him immediately. A week after, he called and I told him the good news. When he finally got to know, I heard him cry in joy. He had been waiting for this moment too, just as much as I.

Despite the distance, my husband provided me with the best care so I got to go to the best doctors in town. All through out the pregnancy everything went perfectly well.

December 2007.

On one of the Sundays of the cold, colorful December, I started to feel the pain. I told myself that that is it. The moment I would finally meet my baby girl. I was both excited and scared that day. Would everything be okay? Would my baby be okay? Would I live through the whole process? Would the episiotomy hurt? 

I labored for almost a whole day, my cervix dilating very, very slowly. It was really a long wait, and it was ultimately painful. I have heard stories of women screaming and cursing at their husbands whilst in labor but for me, personally, the pain was both a bless-ing and a curse as far as I can remember, but the moments are now quite hazy when I try to remember them.

When I was there in the delivery room all set to push the baby out to this world, I re-member thinking about my husband. He would have loved to be there to see our baby at that very moment. He was my strength during the whole delivery. Everything went per-fectly fine. After 5 attempts to push her out I finally delivered our baby. 

The rest is now a hazy memory, my baby lying on my stomach, my baby crying as the nurses tried to clean her up, the nurses wheeling me to the recovery room – then to my hospital room.  It was really tiring afterwards. I wanted to sleep for as long as I could but the idea that my daughter was already born now made me want to stay awake. I wanted to see her every minute.

I guess the magical feeling I felt will always be true to mums. It is funny how they say that giving birth is PAINFUL, and it is funny how mothers say that once the baby is born all the pain is then forgotten. True.

I can't even seem to remember!